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Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Grateful...blessed... deeply loved



No Fear in Love
written by Steffany Gretzinger and Nate Ward
2014 Bethel Music
*no copyright infringement intended*

I woke up to the last 39th year of my life with a greater resignation of what lies ahead ~ single blessedness, work, a new community and  long term treatment to prevent the recurrence of cysts...

When I share this with friends, they immediately respond with a quick "solution" in mind [often unsolicited]. And it is often followed by a smart remark on being "outside the walls." 

While well-meaning friends wished to "save" me by suggesting a partner, I gave a different response this time.

While the "silence" quieted a few, it also sparked some memories of my former life. Was my choice [to continue living in chastity] made out of "spite" to prove all of them wrong? 


 I  put my feet on the ground and allow the Lord to lift me up...


And yet the deeper question is not whether I should or should not marry but rather, in choosing to live this life, does my heart expand more to love and accomodate others?

I choose to live in joy... a joy that may not be readily visible to others... but a joy that can be shared in various creative ways... 
through the presence of those who are eager to receive it.

"Here I am Lord, I come to do Your Will."
~Ps. 40: 8a, 9a~


*Supplement reading: 
 Celibacy for the Common Good by Wesley Hill
Embracing the Gift of Singleness  by Mel Ignacio Tempongko

*I thank my twin heart, God's greatest gift in this life ~ who mirrors Christ's  love to me.