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Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Day by Day

I have revisited Jan Neel's post on Sometimes I Wish having in mind Linda Lee's challenge to me. 


Neverland 29 July 2012 Vision Board 
I lifted some photos from google
The children from May Christine Tandoc
The bride and groom from Jim Brandano

It took me a few days of reflection and loads of email advices how come some priorities have been pretty messed up. What was it that I really wanted out of this? What is it that I truly want in my life right now? I was made aware of the reality that no fairy dusts would lift any of my dreams up...

I recalled writing one of my friends a message, there is only one sign that is needed... and I included it in my VB...

4 August 2012 Vision Board


I lifted some photos from google
The painting of Home for Children was done by my dad
The drawings on the left by me (adapted from different sources)
The cross, piano and pastel were my shots
As if perfected in such a fashion ~ it has allowed me to view my dreams in a better perspective...

Here comes the challenge ~ how do I achieve this ~ when I haven't included the source of funding for my needs?

Somehow the Neverland part still surfaces...

When I was younger, I dreamt that I could give my full services freely the way I saw some people did it ~ some relied on charity and donations to sustain them and some were, luckily, born rich.

When I graduated in College, I sought experience in government hospitals and offered my services. Two said yes (and I am forever grateful). I was able to go to different countries through generous sponsors. My experiences were enriched by the people I met.

And then I decided to leave the Garden of Eden and face life.

For two years without work, my parents allowed me to pay off for what I ate by taking care of my nieces (I am able to use some techniques with the children in our Catechism every Saturdays). I enrolled in a Caregiving Class instead of taking up a Masteral in Nursing (Nursing enrolment has declined). I exchanged my words for company and friendship. I devoted time to art, artgroups and forums and an online gallery with Fher (My talent was later noticed by BS Corinne Rodrigues who introduced me to Roy Durham and he asked me to illustrate for his Christmas book in 2011). I devoured books and edified my soul through retreats...(I am able to share them now through my blog)...


I spent time with my guitar and keyboards...
(I met Sulekha Rawat and I began to put music in her poetry)



... I was back to zero but I thank God that nobody ever made me feel like a loser...

I took in a job afterwards that has less stress... less pay but it's enough to cover for my daily expenses...
I was talking with one of my colleagues and I confided that I lay my dreams bare before God
~ I'm not after 'stability' at this moment but I wish to discover what He has in store for me ~



As I took in Linda's challenge, my attitude towards 'earning' money has changed. We're so fond of 'gratis' and 'pro bono' but I realized that if I would like to have a home for the children, I need to invest on a lot and facilities to go with it. If I wish to adopt (a) child(ren), the Department of Social Welfare and Development will assess my financial status and make sure I'm capable of raising (a) child(ren).   And here's the best part, if I wish to visit India or do a pilgrimage to the Holy Land  with my mother, I have to pay for my ticket .

While sharing this with my mom, she asked me, would there be any difference in the way I   served if I knew it'll be compensated? Would I be more effective? zealous?  willing?

Why have I turned down an offer to work at a nursing home two years ago? Would I ever die for a high paid job?  

Then she reminded me of the most critical part ~ deadlines.

For several weeks, I've tried to engage in business classes and I found myself withdrawing ~ hmmm, this one's not for me...nor this one...

Another realization that hit me during these two weeks was... my friends thought  I didn't need the money... I am single and have nobody to care for... I don't earn from blogging, catechizing, making art and music...but God surprised me last Friday. For the very first time, I understood what hard earned money meant for the poor. I worked and got paid for it.


'Many rich people threw in large amounts. But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a few cents...
"They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of poverty, put in everything 
-all she had to live on."'
~ Mk. 12: 41-42, 44 NIV ~


The depth of the Scriptures I have come to live by took on an authentic meaning...


"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear...
your heavenly Father knows that you need them.
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, 
and all these things will be given to you as well."
~ Mt. 6:25, 32-33 NIV ~

P.S.

To my dear friend, I know you've waited for a whole month for this post ~ the answers you have to find for yourself...but know that I'll keep working on mine through God's grace.

Linda Lee, thank you very much!

----
Updates:

Have I confused you dear friend?

I have reached an age when my ideals met with reality. We all need money that's for sure. 
I work in a medical journal now, not in the hospital. I have chosen a career that allows me to be more creative...even with less pay...

Linda's challenge has opened my eyes to the purpose of money, why we work and get paid for our services... It has allowed me to see the 'blocks' inside me that tells me that 'everything' should be gratis... 
I've started 'saving' money for my dreams :)





41 comments:

  1. Dear Melissa,

    I love to see the 'tweaking' you've done on your Vision Board -- thank you for sharing! This is what most people do not realize: Your Vision Board is an ongoing process rather than a finished product.

    I can see you've made tremendous progress in working through various ideas for yourself and your life. There is no doubt in my mind that placing Jesus in the center of your board is a meaningful and empowering move for you! Now, everything else radiates from there, which, clearly is PERFECT for YOU!

    Melissa, Melissa! Wonderful work! Thank you for all that you are! XOXOXOXO

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    1. Thank you so much Linda. I admit that I got myself going because of my reply to your challenge ~ you have allowed me to realize that I have to take responsibility for what I read and write...

      I have to take a mental and heart note that everything should make me go back to my center where the Lord speaks.

      I love you lots!

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  2. Oh, Melissa, your vision board is immensely powerful and inspiring. As Linda mentioned, placing our Lord in the center with everything else radiating out from that speaks volumes about your priorities.
    You are putting God's kingdom above all and, in doing so, your heart is already in the right place and everything will follow in order of God's plan for your life. And, remember this: Money, in and of itself, is not evil. It's how we use/abuse it that causes us to stumble.
    Blessings, dear friend, and don't stop growing in the Spirit!
    Love you!

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    1. You were that friend I wrote Martha :* and the cross is the sign.

      Thank you so much. Everyday, I look at it and say, is this what God wants from me today?

      I think I learned "attract" from Louise Hay :) ~ I do believe money put into proper use put our talents into proper perspectives too :)

      I have seen friends earn money through their passion ~ a book, a novel, a song, an artwork... I hope to learn from all of you.

      Lots of love and always keep me in your prayers :*

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  3. You are such an inspiration Melissa. I like that vision where God was put at the center of our life.
    Go and live your dreams!

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    1. You have always been around Fher to support me~ Thank you! Another inspiration came to me this morning...and I hope this will be my take on your challenge to me. I know it has been two years since you gave the challenge to go out of my box when it comes to creativity and artworks...I hope I'll be able to make it this time :)

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  4. Ahh, that was nice! It will come to you when you least expect it! you'll see...

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    1. Thank you very much Cathy... I believe every word you said :*

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  5. I can see you evolving every time I come and read your posts, soul sis. I loved your vision board! Every dream has its own time and I know yours will too come true in time. God bless you.

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    1. Thank you soul sis ~ I like what you wrote on time :) It helps in developing other virtues :)

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  6. A really inspirational post! I now know how fulfilling it is to earn money for somebody else's sake.Now I do some freelancing work only to put in my little share towards the ongoing treatment of my mom, though it is not necessary(since my dad is capable of funding everything and then there's govt.funding too since my mom was working as a govt,nucl.scientist).My church pastor rightly said that the value of money depends on the way it is spent.
    -Portia

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    1. True dear daughter.Money has its purpose. You'll come to appreciate it as you grow. I continue praying for your mom.

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  7. Very nice and inspirational.

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  8. Melissa, I am grateful for you and your unselfish nature. Your creativity, love and genuine concern for others is what makes you a wonderful person. I am proud to be your friend and pray that all your dreams come true and you live a happy and fulfilled life.
    p.s Thank you for making my poems special with your awesome music :)

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    1. Thank you Sulekha.I think people have their own definition of generosity and selfishness... sometimes, it's okay to be both but we are made to give everything that we hold back to God...

      You and your poems are very special :) Thank you also for allowing me to use them :) They are healing...

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  9. You know what Melisaa,I am so grateful to God that I came across such a wonderful human being,and that is you,I have learned so much from you,and I know you will continue to enrich my life. All I can say,is that may God bless you always,and I pray each one of your dreams come true..love u always.

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    1. I do not possess anything soul sis ~ except my sins. But I do pray that Jesus be the source of everything in my life. He breathed life into my VB...

      Thank you and I do pray for you too :*

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  10. It is always inspiring to learn about how your faith leads you to where you are supposed to be, Melissa. In every post you write, God truly directs your steps because you allowed Him to take lead. It is a blessing that Linda influenced you that way. And it is a blessing that you are sharing what you learned so that others may also learn from your wisdom.

    God bless you always, Melissa! <3 :-)

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    1. Thanks Irene ~ I think the VB redirects all my works and intentions towards the Lord...it should always be Him not me...

      I am very grateful to God who blessed me with a truly caring family...and very wise friends :)

      lots of love always :*

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  11. ... And i noticed that you put floating hearts on the badge I made for you! how lovely! i honestly don't know how to animate graphics. it's still something i need to learn. <3 :-)

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    1. If you've seen me missing in the comments section, it's because I've been experimenting on jpegs and gifs :)

      Perhaps you could try these apps ~ http://www.online-image-editor.com/ or http://gickr.com/ or http://makeagif.com/ :)

      Thanks ;)

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  12. i also want to reach at that point where my ideas match with reality and hey i was not confused:)

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    1. Shukran Zarnab. I think some things need not be hurried because they come right 'in time'.

      You will inshallah :) Be patient.

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  13. Replies
    1. Shukran Izdiher. Lots of love from me too :)

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  14. We only see a step at a time but trust in Jesus helps us believe that he has decided the way and knows where we are going, though we may be often not happy with the immediate. wishing u the best

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    1. Amen Jerly. Thank you! I hope so too...

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  15. Melissa I love your Vision Board, and your dreams. You're young but you have already had such a long and interesting journey. You're love and beauty (both inner and outer) are gifts to all. I wish you all the best with your new position. The sky is the limit for you my dear.

    P.S. I'm still learning how to value my services Melissa. It would be great if we lived in a world where everything is free...but we don't.
    Hugs!

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    1. Thank you so much Leah. God has spiced this journey with so many adventures. I learn a lot from your wisdom :*

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  16. This is exactly the kind of blog that I needed as of the moment. I could really relate to your experiences. Though there were many differences. One thing is for sure, we all have our own hurdle that we need to jump through.

    I've learned that we can be happy with the little things that we have accomplished if we have worked hard and heartfully for it. :)

    I am in awe with this post. Fighting!

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    1. I understood what you wrote here after I visited your recent post.

      Oh Key, you are young and like a mother, I fear for the risks you take. But I know that God will always be with you.

      I liked what you wrote about being happy with the little things we have accomplished through hard work and love :)

      I am with you through prayers...

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  17. Melissa, what lovely vision boards and a great challenge to be a part of. You are blessed to have a supportive family that allowed you the chance to do some soul searching and find your own way. That is the beauty and bounty of family. I'm so glad that you evaluated what earning money means to you. A lot of times people fly blindly into careers based on nothing but material needs, but you took the time to see where you fit best. All of the experiences and knowledge you gained will serve you well as you continue on your life's journey. Blessings to you!

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    1. Your words are filled with wisdom Tameka. I like what you wrote about my family. It's true.

      Thank you for your blessings :* Lots of love!

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  18. "The laborer is worthy of his wages" Luke 10:7. You are so SPECIAL. I love your heart and how much you pour into others. I see a lot of myself, in you. I used to do anything, for everyone, and never expected a penny back. But, I soon realized that there are people that take advantage of a charitable HEART and that I was exhausting myself, by over committing to others needs. God wants to bless us in every way, so that we may bless others. This includes financial success. I am so proud of you, for all that you do and for WHO you are! I love your vision board and remember, He will give you ALL the desires of your heart!

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    1. You keep on affirming my heart's desires. I know God listens ;)

      I've read you writing about exhaustion twice. It is when we give and 'overdo' it.

      Going back to our Source Lisa. Grazie tantissimo :*

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  19. I'm so happy you have found a resolution for this, Melissa! This is also related to one of my concerns, earning money in such a way that I also serve people and use the gifts God has given me. I'm having a dilemma lately because I feel I may need to get back to a regular job to finance my needs. I promised to still continue being of service to others, but then I would have to devote lesser time in this if I would take on a regular job again. This somehow makes me feel sad. I'm still praying that God may grant me the answer I'm searching for.

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    1. I've been thinking and praying for you Jocelyn. The answers that you seek, you shall definitely find.

      I think you need to find balance between your work and desire to serve. You should have both :)

      When I was praying for work, I told God that I'll share my time with the street children. I browsed on several institutions but at the end, I found myself with the children in my own street.

      God knows where we shall thrive best. I know you'll bloom wherever God plants you. Lots of love!

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    2. Thank you, Melissa! It really feels good to know someone understands what I'm going through. ;) God bless!

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  20. Melissa, your vision board is happiness, joy, laughter, peace, love, the kingdom on earth depicted – with Christ right where he belongs: in the center of it all. That’s how I see it too.
    Your final statements here, “Seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you…” that is my theme in life. My God shall supply all your needs, according to his riches in glory through Christ Jesus.
    Meanwhile, keep up your artistic/creative work. Know that you are such a blessing to everyone you meet, to every life you touch.

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    1. Thank you so much Debra. Peace - that's where I wish to find myself. Everything else is nothing without God's presence.

      I am so glad you stopped by today before I put my new post. I feel blessed with your presence and words of wisdom.

      Thank you.

      P.S. I loved your post. You are right ~ I need a quiet time to write ;)

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