Ahuv Sheli

"You are not meant for convent life... ..and if you're thinking about it... I beg you to reconsider..." I was taken by surprise when two of my male  friends wrote me this... perhaps, it was due to my prolonged absence from the social media.  I reflected on the occasions I felt myself torn apart by indecision... but it wasn't about this... Not at all... I miss the life I had ~ I call it my glorious years in the mission field. I was young and impulsive. I didn't have second thoughts. Back then, the moment was right ~ pieces fit together.  I dreamt big. I wanted to be included in history as 'somebody' who did this or was good at that... But there was also a part of me that wished to remain ' hidden '... and that part could only be touched and visited by God. Early on this week, I finally got to visit a friend who was stricken by cancer. I didn't recognize her when I saw her ~ her face was bloated and she w

I'm beginning to love October... It is the month of healing and recuperation for me. Song: My Love by Sia Furler  co written by Oliver Kraus Source:  http://idolator.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/ECLIPSE-soundtrack-My-Love-Sia.mp3 I had three  stillpoints  in my life outside the walls... First, when Sam left...  second, when my sister decided to experiment further with her future  and lastly, when a very close friend died in a tragic way. Something inside me craved for silence... not the one we know of ~ mute... cut off from contacts...   but the kind that is filled with the presence of the 'Other'. This time around 'we' meditated on ' protect '... ---- A particular memory of the 'street kids' we used to assist came to my mind. image adapted from a news photo in Tempo We took them out of the streets and provided them shelter, food and clothing... It was good for a time until we noticed a

"This heart scares easily..." - Rancho, Three Idiots   I found myself 'discussing' Three Idiots at four in the morning with a dear friend. It is an excellent movie ~totally hilarious and yet at the same time riveting . "Are some parts there realistic?," I curiously inquired ... "Do their parents determine their children's future ~ as engineers or doctors?" "Is suicide rate really high among students?" And my friend answered with a curt, "Yes..." ---------- The movie reminded me of high school ... Way back into our  Carpe Diem  days...  Henry   Thoreau, Robert Frost and of course,  Mr. John Keating... We were so eager to suck the marrows of life and contribute a verse! It was at that moment when my heart was awakened by the beauty of poetry and literature. I devoured Thoreau's contemplation of life and made them my own... Read: Where I Lived, and What I Lived For I con