Ahuv Sheli

“ But to recommend thrift to the poor is both grotesque and insulting. It is like advising a man who is starving to eat less .” ~ Oscar Wilde This was a quote I heard from my brother yesterday after hearing the public discussions on DTI’s proposed five-hundred-peso Noche Buena. The reactions were immediate... many saw the amount as impractical, while others viewed it as dismissive of families who work hard and hope to prepare a proper meal for Christmas. Yet the issue extends beyond a single recommendation. A similar “five-hundred-peso mentality” appears in everyday settings.. in workplaces where employees are paid below fair standards, in the absence of incentives despite steady performance and in the general lowering of expectations placed on the poor. These patterns diminish not only economic well-being but also BASIC dignity. There is also a tendency to judge how others spend, whether on simple comforts or occasional indulgences, while some rely on donated meals for anything beyo...

Resting to Love Again I’ve been sensing some negativity around a friend... someone who, I know, doesn’t mean to be that way. It’s just how she is. But lately, I’ve also felt the weight of my own thoughts... the shadows of weariness and self-doubt that threaten my peace. In the past, I would pull away as an escape... hiding from people, convincing myself that solitude was safer than struggle. But this time, it is different. I am learning to recognize my mind’s fragility, to honor it, and to care for myself before I fall into despair, depression, or mistrust. So I am leaving some blank spaces in between... not out of hatred, disgust, or irritability, but out of love. These pauses are not walls but breaths of grace, moments to order my mind and realign my heart with God. Even Jesus withdrew from the crowds to pray (Luke 5:16). He teaches me that stepping away is not abandonment; it is a way to return with renewed compassion. I rest not to distance myself from love, but to let it grow pur...

Every time someone dies, a part of us dies too. There is a pain that grips the heart, followed by the sobering realization that our own time will also come. Death stirs questions that words cannot easily answer. In recent years, we have lost several cousins aged forty to sixty One of them I had just greeted on his birthday... two days later, news came that he had died. Another was a friend with whom I often exchanged messages. She struggled deeply but spoke of hope and of living for her daughter. One night, I received a call saying she had taken her own life.  I found myself asking: Have I really been there for them? Have I listened enough? Did I send a message of encouragement when they needed it most? Because it is better to offer flowers and speak kind words while they can still be received and cherished. Perhaps this is what God is teaching me through these losses... that love must be expressed now, not postponed. And if I have failed to do so today, may God grant me the grace...

I was surprised to realize that today we celebrate the Solemnity of All Dominican Saints. During Mass, the priest asked, “Who inspires you?” The question lingered in my heart, stirring memories long tucked away. I was inspired by my younger brother, who introduced me to books when I was a child... and through his stories, I first met St. Francis of Assisi. By my mother, who taught me the value of study and perseverance. By my parents’ quiet generosity toward the poor, which showed me what love looks like in action. By St. Teresa of Avila, who was honest about her struggles in prayer, yet remained a faithful friend of Jesus. By St. John of the Cross, whose poetry spoke of the beauty that can blossom in darkness. By a gentle person in high school, whose kindness reflected God’s tenderness. By the film Bishop Romero, which revealed the cost and courage of standing with the truth. These memories are not just fragments of the past... they are foundations of my calling. Each person, saint an...

I recently watched a Chinese drama entitled, " Love Yourself More ," because of Li Keyi and Wang Pei Yan, two actors whose on-screen chemistry I admire.  What I expected to be just another romantic story surprised me with something deeper... a character development reminiscent of Japanese animes, where growth and meaning slowly unfold. The most beautiful part came in the final ten minutes, through lines that I will never forget: “Happiness is not something others can give you. If it was, it can easily be taken away. Only the happiness that you give yourself is real.” “Thank you for letting me see the shining side of myself. I didn’t do anything. You have always been the sun, just briefly covered by clouds. What I can do is stay by your side, waiting for the wind to clear the clouds.” Those words struck me deeply. They reminded me of how often we seek happiness and validation in people, achievements or fleeting emotions, when in truth, real joy comes from within, f...

Putting Heart Into the Work Last year, I asked permission from my bosses to report to the office only twice a week. Those two days are a little breather from my daily routine of feeding my furbabies and doing home-based work. Though brief, my days in the office are always full... filled with reports, feedback and, sometimes, complaints about the younger ones or the newbies. It’s been almost two years since they were hired and while their bosses often say their work approach reflects “their generation,” I can’t help but think it also reflects the kind of formation (we) received in school. I suddenly appreciated why, since elementary days, we were taught to lead groups, work with others, make decisions together and communicate clearly. Those exercises weren’t just for grades... they were training grounds for life. They taught us cooperation, accountability and empathy. Now, I see how easily these values can fade when work becomes just a routine and not a mission. The struggle is not abou...

There was a viral post of a young woman crying after a government employee allegedly belittled her instead of helping her. It struck a nerve because we’ve all been there... facing someone in authority who makes us feel small when all we need is a bit of kindness. It reminded me of my time on mission in Italy. I once accompanied an elderly sister to an office, I think for her health insurance, and instead of a smile, we were greeted with a scowl.  The line was long, the air heavy with impatience. Yet this elderly sister, instead of reacting harshly, gently said to the woman behind the counter, “You must be tired.” In an instant, the atmosphere softened. A small act of understanding broke through a wall of frustration. I’ve seen this grace before, especially during our mission in a Muslim country in North Africa. The people were mostly respectful of Christians, but there were some who mocked the sisters for not speaking the language well. Ironically, that became a blessing, because t...

The Big YES I remember when I was just starting my formation years. We were on a resort outing and I wore a plain white shirt. Since I knew I’d be getting wet from swimming, I wrote a big “YES” right in front, just to camouflage what might show through when it got soaked. But my formator noticed it and asked, “What’s the big YES for? What are your intentions?” Back then, I honestly didn’t think much of it. I even felt a bit irritated 🙈🙊... why did everything have to be questioned? It seemed like we were always being asked to examine our motives, our inner reasons for doing even the smallest things. But as the years went by, I finally understood. It wasn’t about being strict... it was about being REAL. It was about learning to face myself, to check what was inside my heart, not just what others could see. Fr. Dela Rosa’s homily brought that memory rushing back. He said something about inviting guests to a banquet just to highlight one’s own importance. PrIde, he explained, has the “I”...

Making Every Second Count Today, as we commemorate the faithful departed, I found myself led to Pope Leo’s prayer intentions for November, offered for those who struggle with suicidal thoughts.  I sat there thinking... why is it that those who still want to live are the ones fighting for every breath, while the younger ones, those who have barely begun to live, sometimes wish to end it all (soon🥹)? What, or who, is their anchor? I guess we all want to be remembered somehow. We want to leave something behind... a mark, a legacy. But for some, the thought of being remembered in weakness or sickness feels unbearable. Some choose to end their story while they’re still “okay,” while others, feeling like a burden, slowly lose the will to fight. It’s such a sad thought… and it makes my heart ache. Then I remembered something Fr. Dela Rosa said in his homily: make each second, each minute, each day count because once they pass, they’re gone forever. That hit me hard. Life isn’t about how ...

Sainthood Is Not an Option, It’s a Must Today we celebrated the Solemnity of All Saints at the Columbary... a sacred reunion of both the living and the dead. The air felt heavy yet holy, filled with remembrance and hope. The priest who celebrated the Mass shared not just blessings for the “tombs,” but blessings for our souls as well. He reminded us of something Pope Francis once said, "Sainthood is not an option but a necessity." It is a challenge for each of us to aim not for comfort, but for holiness. He used the word SAINTS as an acronym. And as he beautifully said, the Beatitudes (Gospel today) are the blueprint of sainthood. S – Sincerity St. Alphonsus Liguori said we must work on our character, not our reputation. Character is who we are before God, doing good even when no one sees us. A – Accountability We are not meant to live only for ourselves. Our time, talent and treasure are gifts meant to bear fruit. E. Powell said, “What we are is God's gift to us. What we ...

When Silence Speaks Louder There are days when I grow tired of explaining myself... of trying to make others see what I see. My words feel wasted, my intentions questioned and my heart misunderstood. I find myself torn between the pride of proving I am right and the humility of simply letting go. But in the stillness that follows my silence, I hear a different voice, not my own, but God’s. He reminds me that not every battle needs to be fought with words. Sometimes, silence is not surrender; it’s trust. It’s saying, “Lord, You see what they cannot. You know my heart.” In a world that glorifies noise and opinions, choosing silence can be an act of faith... a declaration that God’s purpose will prevail even without my arguments. I don’t need to win every debate; I just need to stay right with Him. So I rest in the truth that my silence is not weakness; it is worship. It is me stepping aside so God can speak louder than I ever could. For when the heart is right with God, even silence beco...

When Life Feels Blue and Grey Listening to “Blue & Grey” by BTS feels almost too real sometimes... as if the song was written for the moments when my heart sinks without warning. I feel these ups and lows even after an episode of depression, after I left the walls that once confined me. Sometimes I rise above it; sometimes I don’t. The trusting and surrendering part is agonizing, yet the Lord keeps whispering, “Give it all to Me.” As I look deeper into the realities of others, I realize that sadness, fatigue, and melancholy wear different faces. One cannot compare whose sorrow weighs more or whose struggle runs deeper. Each heart carries a weight that only it can truly understand. The burden is personal, and so is the grace that sustains it. In moments when I sink into the greyness, when even prayer feels heavy and my spirit trembles between faith and fatigue, I remember that the Lord does not measure strength by how quickly I recover but by how I still choose to return to Him, eve...

When Troubles Just Don’t End I was just starting to rise from my blah moments, trying to pray again, trying to find my rhythm, trying to breathe... and then another trouble shows up. I didn’t see it coming. I can’t predict how people will react or what will come out of this mess. I just know that I’m tired of always having to start over, of trying to be strong when I don’t even feel steady inside. And yet, somewhere in the middle of all this, I sense God’s quiet gaze... not distant, not indifferent, just there. Waiting. Holding. Drawing me into a space where I can no longer rely on my own strength. Maybe this is what St. John of the Cross called the dark night ... when everything familiar falls away so only love can remain. Maybe this is how St. Teresa of Avila kept walking, bruised feet and all, because she knew Who walked beside her. So even when the troubles don’t end, I choose to believe that grace hasn’t either. And maybe that’s enough for today.

When Everything Feels Blah There are days when everything just feels dull ... when faith feels dry, prayers feel heavy and I’m left wondering where the spark went. Maybe this is God’s quiet invitation to surrender again... to let go of the resentments I’ve tucked away, the disappointments I’ve tried to ignore, the fears and anxieties I keep carrying. Maybe the blah is not emptiness but a space where He wants to meet me, heal me and remind me that I don’t have to keep holding everything together. So, Lord, I come to You with all that feels stuck and silent. Help me face what I’ve been avoiding. Heal the heaviness I cannot name. Teach me to rest, to trust, to find joy again... not in the noise of life but in the nearness of Your love.

When Trust Breaks When trust is lost, something deep within us cracks. The bond we thought was steady suddenly feels fragile. It’s easy to close the door and guard the heart. But God doesn’t ask us to forget the wound... He asks us to walk through it with grace. To trust again doesn’t mean becoming blind or naïve. It means letting God heal the part of us that became hard. It means acting with fairness even when feelings want revenge, speaking truth without malice, and choosing charity when suspicion comes easily. Sometimes trust is rebuilt; sometimes it’s simply surrendered to God. Either way, the call is the same... to love without bitterness, to see others not as threats, but as souls still being shaped by mercy, just like us. Because in the end, the strength of our faith is not proven by how perfectly others keep their word but by how faithfully we keep our hearts aligned with His.

There are those who build 'programs' in the name of 'service' all “for the good” of others. Yet sometimes, beneath the noble mission lies a hunger... not for God’s glory, but for one’s own lasting name. It is pride baptized in purpose, the subtle sin of holy ambition. PRIDE has many forms, not just arrogance or vanity, but the desire to be seen, remembered or applauded for doing good.  That is why we must constantly pause for a heart check: Whose kingdom am I really building... mine or God’s? --- Resources: Gospel of the day (Luke 18, 9-14) Fr. dela Rosa's reflection on pride and humility (https://mb.com.ph/2025/10/26/what-makes-us-look-like-the-devil)

My niece shared another story about a young person who took her own life. Hearing that always touches something deep in me. I’ve been through my own season of depression... days when I thought I had no strength left, when shame and regret felt heavier than I could bear. But God never let go. Through prayer, love, and patience from my family, I found healing. That’s why my heart aches for those who are struggling now. Depression doesn’t mean someone is weak; it means they’ve carried pain for too long. What people need most isn’t judgment, but understanding...a friend who listens, a mother’s care, a prayer whispered in faith. We may not always know what to say, but we can remind them that they are not alone. God sees, holds and restores. Even when we fall apart, His hands never let go. --- Lord, I lift up every person who is quietly hurting, those battling sadness or despair. Hold them close and remind them that You are near. Strengthen families caring for loved ones who struggle and use...

The Knowing Yet Not Doing I am coming to terms with this truth: We all KNOW about death, time’s limits, God, Heaven, purgatory, the devil and hell. We know the dangers of cigarette smoking, the harm of dumping garbage anywhere, the 'excess' of eating too much and the vanity of eating too little for appearances. We know what chemicals, plastics and selfish habits are doing to our lungs, our hearts and our planet. We know where the path of lust and greed leads... And now, in this digital age, we also know the harm of too much social media (our gauge meter)... the comparison, distraction, pride and envy it feeds into our souls. We know how it robs us of real connection, quiet reflection and time with God. We know so much and yet we live as though we don’t. We walk through life aware of the truth but unwilling to change. We cling to comfort, procrastination and false security, thinking there’s always tomorrow. Going back to the podcast I once listened to... The guest shared his nea...

The struggle The pain is back.. and so are the moods, the noise within and around me, the careless throwing of garbage, the stress. Some days seem lighter, but before long, everything returns to what feels like “normal”... a normal that sadly includes the daily disregard for others’ space, order and peace. Yet today, I realize the difference lies not in the noise but in how I choose to respond. I may fall, but I can always rise again because my heart belongs to the Lord. His love steadies me when everything else feels unstable. His grace reminds me that peace is not the absence of chaos but the calm found in trusting Him amid it all. Faith is not about escaping the mess of life. It is about finding meaning and strength within it. When I shift my gaze back to God, everything else fades in comparison. Love always outweighs the noise. Lord, thank You for the reminder that Your presence is my peace. Help me and all who feel weary today, to return to You whenever the world feels heavy. Tea...

Signs of the Times What started as a simple news clip I came across on Instagram about China’s digital system somehow caught the algorithm and suddenly, my entire feed was filled with videos about digital IDs. It felt eerily familiar. Back in high school, people were already talking about “the end of the world,” the rise of evil and a mark that would one day be embedded in human skin to track and control us. Now, I am almost 50 years old, I can’t help but notice how the signs of the times are unfolding before my eyes... earthquakes, floods, wars, innocent lives lost, children being groomed and misled, social media redefining our worth, the confusion of values, the normalization of sin and the persecution of faith. And now, with the rise of artificial intelligence and surveillance technology, it feels like we are being subtly conditioned to surrender control. I suddenly had a chilling realization... that perhaps the introduction of smartphones, QR codes, cashless payments and even NFC c...